Low-Carb, So Simple!

Fluffy Flourless Keto Chocolate Sheet Cake

July 19, 2026 By elviira Leave a Comment

There is a very specific rabbit hole on YouTube, and its name is The Icing Artist. If you haven’t discovered Laurie’s channel yet, consider this both a warning and a recommendation. She reviews and tastes the most ridiculously fancy cakes and desserts you can imagine, and I’ve been watching her videos far more than a grown woman should probably admit.

After enough of those videos, something predictable happened: I started fancying cake.

Here’s the small problem. I mostly follow a carnivore lifestyle, which means no flours in my kitchen. And before anyone asks, no, I don’t sneak in keto flours or fibers either. Not almond, not coconut, not psyllium, not a single one. I like my baking clean and simple, as plant-free as possible.

But I do keep dark chocolate and cocoa powder in the pantry for the occasional treat (and to avoid oxalate dumping; I’ve got my share of kidney stone attacks leading to sepsis), and that was enough of a loophole for me. I already have a beloved purely Carnivore Cake Roll for when the mood strikes, but this time, plain wasn’t going to cut it. I wanted chocolate. I wanted fluffy — without flour, if that was even possible. And I wanted an unreasonable amount of buttercream frosting doing its job between the layers.

So, I rolled up my sleeves, and this Fluffy Flourless Keto Chocolate Sheet Cake happened.

Originally, I grabbed my Carnivore Cake Roll recipe and was already mentally adding the grated chocolate and cocoa powder to it, thrilled with my little plan. But then I counted the ingredients and realized I would blow past my 5-ingredient limit for this blog. So, I started pondering which ingredient I could get away with skipping without ruining the texture. After some back-and-forth with myself, I decided to leave out the cream cheese, and honestly, it turned out to be the best decision. The cake came out fluffy, chocolatey, and delicious, and it held together beautifully. To be fair, I was fully expecting it to fall apart the moment I tried to lift a slice, so it was a very happy surprise.

The beauty of this cake is that it can be whatever you need it to be. My son, who is a young man of simple pleasures, likes his slice with a generous cloud of whipped cream and a handful of strawberries on the side, and honestly, that is a perfect way to enjoy it. But if you want to go the full Icing Artist route (minus the carb coma and irritated gut), you can turn this into a proper layered chocolate cake with a rich, creamy filling that will make you close your eyes on the first bite.

At the end of this post, you will find plenty of tips for variations and filling ideas, so you can adjust this cake to whatever your taste buds are begging for today.
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Carnivore Butter-Basted Stuffed Whole Chicken

July 12, 2026 By elviira 2 Comments

You know that feeling when you walk into the grocery store planning to buy absolutely nothing exciting, and then you spot a whole chicken sitting there on the discount shelf, giving you those big sad “please take me home before I expire” eyes? Well, that’s exactly what happened to me. And, I did not have the heart to walk past.

Usually, I don’t make whole chicken. It’s just not something that lands on my kitchen counter very often. But there it was — a perfectly good bird at a bargain price, one day away from being tossed — and I decided it was destiny. Or dinner. Possibly both.

Now, I do have at least one whole chicken recipe here on my blog. It’s a proper oldie, one of those recipes that’s been quietly sitting in the archives for years. Back in its heyday, it was wildly popular — so popular it got picked up by a food magazine, and it even made it into my Finnish keto book, which (drum roll, please) was published exactly 10 years ago. Ten years! I nearly needed a moment to sit down when I realized that.

But this time, I wanted to do something different. Something carnivore-friendly. Something that would make this humble discount chicken feel like the star of the show. So the pondering began. What on earth do you stuff a chicken with when you’re skipping breadcrumbs, rice, herbs, veggies, and basically every classic stuffing ingredient known to humankind?

Crushed pork rinds. That was my first spark of an idea. Great texture, carnivore-approved, and just the right kind of crunchy base to build on. But pork rinds alone felt a bit too plain for such a special occasion, so I kept thinking. And then — completely out of nowhere — halloumi popped into my head. Yes, halloumi! That gloriously flavorful, salty, squeaky cheese that would definitely wake up an otherwise fairly neutral chicken and give the pork rinds something exciting to hang out with.

Then came the next puzzle: how to actually incorporate the halloumi. I stood there in the kitchen thinking maybe I should cube it, or slice it, or chop it into little chunks. But then I gave the block a poke and realized — this thing is hard. Which meant one thing: grating. And oh my, does halloumi grate beautifully. Fine, fluffy little shreds that mix into anything like a dream.

At that point, I had my two heroes — pork rinds and halloumi — but they needed a friend to hold them together. Enter butter. Lots of butter. Because chicken, bless it, is on the leaner side and could really use some extra fat. And butter doesn’t just add fat; it adds that rich, golden, comforting flavor that makes everything taste like a friendly hug. So I used softened butter to bind the stuffing into a lovely dough-like consistency, and then I used more butter to bathe the chicken from the outside as it roasted. Because if you’re going to do a butter-basted chicken, you may as well go all in.

The result? A wonderfully juicy, rich, flavorful chicken with a crispy golden skin and a stuffing so tasty I could honestly eat it straight from the bowl. It’s genuinely one of those recipes where you take the first bite and immediately think, “Well, this is going to be a regular thing now.”

And the best part? You can easily tweak this recipe with your favorite seasonings if you use seasonings, that is. Or, if you’re keeping things strictly carnivore, just salt is more than enough — and you can always swap the halloumi for another type of cheese.

So next time you spot a lonely whole chicken on the discount shelf, don’t hesitate. Grab it, take it home, and give it the buttery, cheesy, carnivore-friendly send-off it deserves.
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Super Fudgy Keto Chocolate Mug Cake (using Beef Protein)

July 5, 2026 By elviira 4 Comments

There is no such thing as too many keto mug cake recipes. Especially chocolatey ones. It is basically a universal truth, right up there with “cats will always sit on the one thing you actually need” and “the moment you sit down, someone will need something.”

For a while now, I have been selling grass-fed beef protein powder in my Finnish clean keto online store — unflavored, vanilla, and chocolate — and yet, somehow, I had never actually tried it myself. Classic case of “the shoemaker’s kids go barefoot.” I finally decided it was high time to fix that, so I grabbed the chocolate-flavored version (because obviously) and set out to see what beef protein could really do.

Now, I could have just stirred it into a shake and called it a day. But where’s the fun in that? I love a good kitchen challenge, and lately I have been binge-watching The Icing Artist on YouTube. She works with all the sugary, wheaty, technicolor-chemical stuff I steer far away from, but the woman is an absolute joy to watch, and I keep getting fantastic ideas for cleaner keto and carnivore baking from her videos. So naturally, I started dreaming of a proper cake.

Then real life happened. Orders to pack, virtual shelves to fill, and approximately zero hours to spend babysitting a cake in the oven. So the grand cake idea shrank into a much more reasonable mug cake plan. Small, fast, doable — and still a genuine challenge, because I had no idea whether beef protein even behaves in baking, or if it would stage a dramatic protest the moment it hit heat.

I pondered, I plotted, I mixed, I microwaved. And to my great surprise, my very first attempt was actually pretty good! The flavor was amazing, the texture was on its way to being lovely — but the cake was slightly raw in the middle, and, oh yes, it had erupted like Mount Vesuvius all over the inside of my microwave. Turns out beef protein plus high heat plus a small mug equals chocolate lava disaster.

Luckily, I already knew the fix from my mug meatloaf experiments: lower power, longer time. And that, my friends, is the magic combination. No more overflow, no more raw center — just a perfectly fudgy, rich, chocolatey mug cake that comes together in minutes.

I ate mine with whipped cream. Then I ate another one with the keto buttercream frosting I had whipped up (blame The Icing Artist and her endless parade of buttercream — I already have plenty of keto frosting recipes of my own, so this was inevitable). Both versions were dangerously good. And honestly? I am still a little amazed that a scoop of beef protein powder can turn into something this delicious this fast.

So if you have ever eyed a tub of beef protein and wondered whether it can do more than sit in a shake — the answer is a very enthusiastic yes.
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Instant Carnivore Frozen Yogurt

June 28, 2026 By elviira Leave a Comment

Last week I was in Corfu, living my best carnivore life and eating gloriously well — but that story is already told in last week’s post.

You might remember that the fridge was running a little too cold, and my Greek yogurt froze? And honestly, it was absolutely delicious! Thick, creamy, cold, and refreshing in the Corfu heat — I was completely sold. Right there and then, I knew I had to make a proper Carnivore Frozen Yogurt when I got home. Something a little more sophisticated than just tucking a yogurt tub in the freezer and hoping for the best.

But then I got back to Finland and real life hit me like a freight train. Dozens and dozens of orders waited for packing, and the virtual shelves of my clean keto and carnivore online store needed filling. That’s when the idea of an Instant Carnivore Frozen Yogurt started taking shape. Luckily, I already had a recipe for Instant Carnivore Cheesecake Slush / Ice Cream, so I used it as a base. Since Greek yogurt is runnier than cream cheese, I reduced the heavy cream — and that solution turned out to be perfect.

No freezing, no churning, no waiting — just pure creamy frozen yogurt bliss in under a minute.

And the timing could not be more perfect: Europe is currently absolutely baking. My son is in Vienna right now, where temperatures are pushing close to 40°C (104°F) — which is the kind of heat that makes you want to live inside a freezer. So whether you’re in Vienna, Helsinki, or anywhere in between, this one’s for you. Cold, creamy, carnivore-approved, and ready before you’ve even finished complaining about the heat.
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Eating Carnivore in Corfu, Greece’s Most Beautiful Island

June 21, 2026 By elviira 2 Comments

If I could live anywhere in the world, Corfu would win without competition. I’m here right now, in the middle of a glorious week on this magnificent island, and I’m already dreading the moment I have to leave. One week feels laughably short. Next time, I’m negotiating several weeks, maybe months.

Here’s the thing about Corfu that nobody quite prepares you for: it’s green. Outrageously, extravagantly, almost offensively green. If you’ve been to other Greek islands — Santorini, Mykonos, Rhodes — you know the drill: stunning, dramatic, sun-bleached white and golden brown as far as the eye can see. Beautiful, absolutely. But Corfu threw out that rulebook entirely. This island is draped in endless olive groves, tall swaying cypress trees, and rolling hills so lush they look like they belong somewhere in Tuscany rather than Greece. And then, just when you think it couldn’t get any better, those hills tumble down into the most breathtakingly clear, turquoise-blue sea you’ve ever laid eyes on.

The warm, slightly humid air hits you the moment you step off the plane and wraps around you like a welcome hug. Swimming in that crystal-clear sea every day — sometimes twice, sometimes three times — feels less like exercise and more like an absolute privilege. I walk steep hillside paths, drive the hilariously narrow, winding roads that somehow fit two cars if everyone holds their breath, and every single morning, I roll out my mat on the balcony for pilates or yoga while the island slowly wakes up around me, already warm before 8 am.

I was here in 2021 and spent every day completely enchanted. I had already followed a keto diet for years and even experimented with this cheesy keto bread recipe while staying in a stone-built mini villa. Since the villa didn’t have a microwave, I prepared fathead dough in a saucepan — a method that turned out to be so handy that I’ve used it ever since. I’ve been quietly obsessed with returning to Corfu ever since. Now I’m back, and Corfu is every bit as spectacular as I remembered — maybe even more so.

In this post, I’m stepping away from my usual recipes to tell you about my week in Corfu — what I ate, where I ate it, and why eating carnivore in Greece feels less like following a diet and more like living exactly the way I want to live.
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Savory Carnivore Bacon & Cheese Flan

June 14, 2026 By elviira Leave a Comment

If you’ve ever looked at a traditional flan and thought, “Lovely, but where’s the bacon?” — congratulations, you are exactly the kind of person this recipe was made for. Flan has always been a bit of a show-off. It wiggles, it gleams, it arrives at the table looking impossibly elegant, and everyone oohs and aahs over it. The only problem is that it’s sweet, and frankly, the carnivore community has been criminally underserved in the wobbly food department. Until now.

This savory bacon and cheese flan is what happens when a classic French custard takes a long, hard look at itself in the mirror and decides to make some — seriously healthy — life changes. Out goes the caramel and vanilla. In comes crispy bacon, sharp aged cheese, and enough heavy cream to make a mainstream cardiologist nervous. The result is a dish that has all the elegance and drama of a proper flan — the silky texture, the satisfying wobble, the theatrical flip onto the plate — but tastes like the best parts of a bacon cheeseburger decided to reinvent themselves as fine dining.

And here is the really good news: this carnivore flan is much easier to make than it looks. You whisk a few things together, pour them into ramekins, let the oven do most of the heavy lifting, and then take all the credit when the beauty slides onto the plate looking like something from a fancy restaurant. Nobody needs to know. That is between you and the oven.
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Carnivore Bacon-Wrapped Scotch Eggs

June 7, 2026 By elviira Leave a Comment

Scotch eggs have been around since the 1700s, and honestly, they were pretty great to begin with — a boiled egg wrapped in sausage meat, breaded, and deep-fried. Simple, hearty, and delicious. Nobody was complaining. Well, except for the breadcrumbs. And shame on you if you cooked your Scotch eggs in toxic seed oils! There was clearly room for a little improvement.

You see, the traditional Scotch egg has been slowly weighed down over the centuries by well-meaning cooks who tried to “improve” it with things that simply don’t belong, like fancy herbs, exotic spices, gluten-free (still starchy) coatings, served with an artisanal mustard dipping sauce on a slate board at some trendy gastropub for $25 a pop. No thank you. If you are going to improve a classic, you don’t do it by adding plants and grains; you do it by adding more meat.

So, here’s my animal-based take on this classic: Carnivore Bacon-Wrapped Scotch Eggs. No grains, no starch, no slate boards. Definitely no seed oils. Just a perfectly cooked egg nestled inside salt-seasoned ground pork, lovingly wrapped in bacon for good measure. Three ingredients (plus salt), one magnificent result.

Yes, assembling these takes a little patience — wrapping a slippery peeled egg in meat is not quite as straightforward as it sounds — but the effort is absolutely worth it. These make a great snack, a satisfying meal, or a very respectable and pretty addition to any carnivore spread. Make a batch, and I guarantee they won’t be sitting around for long!
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Keto Mozzarella Flatbread (Carnivore-Friendly)

May 31, 2026 By elviira Leave a Comment

Six years ago, I came up with my 4-Ingredient Super-Tasty Keto Flatbread. It was loosely based on fathead dough, minus the egg, plus Boursin cheese and onion powder doing some serious flavor work in the background. Almond flour held it all together, and honestly, that bread was a hit.

Six years later, here I am — carnivore and endlessly curious. So, the obvious question was: can I carnivore-fy my old flatbread by swapping almond flour for finely crushed pork rinds?

The plan was simple on paper: ditch the almond flour, swap in finely crushed pork rinds, lose the onion powder, but keep the Boursin because the flavor is worth fighting for. Bonus points for getting the ingredient count down to just three.

Then reality intervened.

Boursin, which used to live happily on Finnish grocery store shelves, had quietly disappeared from every store I checked. Vanished. Gone. So I grabbed the next best thing — a garlic and herb flavored cream cheese. The only catch: Boursin packs a glorious 40% fat, and my replacement had a much more modest 20%. Not ideal. I had concerns.

Swapping almond flour for pork rinds also isn’t a 1:1 situation, so I spent a while doing the math, eyeballing the ratios, and generally pretending I knew what I was doing. To my genuine surprise, the very first batch worked. The dough came together smooth and pliable, rolled out without protest, and behaved itself all the way to the oven and back.

And the taste? Absolutely fantastic — the flavored cream cheese did all the heavy lifting in the flavor department. If you prefer to keep things strictly plain carnivore, plain cream cheese works too. And as always, I’ve got a whole bunch of variations waiting for you at the end of the post.
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Carnivore Cookie Dough Balls

May 24, 2026 By elviira 2 Comments

Cookie dough is one of those things that people pretend they don’t eat raw, but absolutely do. Don’t lie. We’ve all been there, spoon in hand, standing over the mixing bowl with zero shame and zero regret. It’s basically a universal human experience, right up there with eating ice cream straight from the freezer at midnight.

The problem is that traditional cookie dough is basically the unholy trinity — sugar, wheat flour, and some plant-based fat that has no business being in food — held together by misguided optimism. Not exactly carnivore-friendly. Not exactly human-friendly either, if we’re being completely honest about what margarine or plant oil actually is.

Now, if you’ve been searching for carnivore cookie dough recipes online, you’ve probably noticed something suspicious: most of them contain sweeteners, vanilla extract, and other plant-based ingredients that have quietly gate-crashed the carnivore party. They’re wearing a carnivore costume, but they’re not fooling anyone. These Carnivore Cookie Dough Balls, however, are the real deal — 100% animal-based, zero plant ingredients, no exceptions, no compromises, no sneaky vanilla extract hiding in the back.

But if you do want sweetener or flavoring options — no judgment here — I’ve got you covered with plenty of variations at the end of the post, as usual. And if sweet isn’t your thing at all, I’ve got savory variations too, because these little dough balls are nothing if not versatile.

However, even with the basic ingredients, the result is shockingly good. Buttery, rich, slightly chewy. No baking required. No flour, no sugar, no plant oils, and no explaining yourself to anyone who gives you a funny look for eating pork rind-coated butter balls for dessert. Their loss, frankly.

Just make them, chill them, and prepare yourself for the very real possibility that the whole batch disappears before anyone else gets a look in. You’ve been warned.
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Dairy-Free Caffeine-Free Tallow Latte

May 17, 2026 By elviira 2 Comments

Let’s address the elephant in the room immediately.

This is called a latte. It contains no dairy. It contains no caffeine. It contains eggs, beef fat, and boiling water.

And it is absolutely, unequivocally a latte.

If that sentence made you raise an eyebrow, good. Keep reading.

The truth is, “latte” has always just meant a warm, frothy, creamy drink that makes you feel like a functional human being. By that definition — which I have just personally expanded — this qualifies. C’mon, people call “latte” even those inferior oat milk, soy milk, or other plant-puss-containing substandard creations, so I have every right to call my glorious egg and tallow-based drink a latte.

Enthusiastically. It’s 100% animal-based, it takes approximately three minutes to make, and it delivers that warm, satisfying, velvety pick-me-up that your morning desperately needs.

It’s also portable. Pour it into a thermos and take it with you wherever the day leads. Morning commute, forest walk (like I did), passive-aggressive work meeting — this latte fits all occasions.

And if you need your caffeine fix, some sweetness, or other tweaks to make this your perfect drink — don’t worry. I’ve got you covered with plenty of variations at the end of this post. But first, let’s make the simplest, most unexpected latte of your life.
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