Hold your horses and park that “Ewww!” at the door because I’m about to serve up a slice of truth with a side of history. Now, if the mere mention of blood in a recipe has you reaching for the barf bag, maybe it’s time to ask yourself why you’re so out of touch with good old Mother Nature.
Blood isn’t just for vampires and B-movie horror flicks, folks. It’s a time-honored superfood that’s been jazzing up the human menu for eons! Here in Finland, we are flipping savory blood pancakes like it’s no big deal because, guess what? It isn’t! These iron-packed flapjacks are as traditional as it gets. But let me tell you, the store-bought stuff is to authentic blood pancakes what a whoopee cushion is to comedy — a cheap imitation.
That’s why I’ve cooked up a blood pancake recipe that’s straight out of the ancestral cookbook, ditching those weird, modern Franken ingredients that have been wreaking havoc on our bodies and minds.
So, who’s ready to join the real nutrient revolution and eat like the apex humans we’re destined to be? Let’s raise our forks and take a bite out of history!
Frequently Asked (and slightly cheeky) Questions:
What on earth does this bloody recipe consist of?
Perfect! You got one ingredient right: blood. Beef blood. In addition, you’ll need 3 organic free-range eggs that you are going to beat until very fluffy — and unrefined sea salt to season the whole thing. That’s it, only 3 good-for-you ingredients!
Did you just say beef blood? Like, the liquid life force of a cow?
You bet your steak knife, I did! It’s the secret sauce of the ancients, and it’s making a comeback in kitchens with a flair for the dramatic (and nutritious).
Can I use chicken blood or do I have to moo-ve it to beef?
While chicken blood could work in theory, beef blood is the traditional go-to for these pancakes. It’s got that robust flavor that really beefs up the meal experience. Except. The inferior commercial additive-packed insults to real blood pancakes use pig blood. So, in case you cannot get beef blood (which I abso-bloody-lutely recommend), pig blood is the next best choice.
How fluffy can I expect these pancakes to be?
Think of the fluffiest kitten you’ve ever seen. Now, lower your expectations because these are blood pancakes, not clouds. Thanks to beaten eggs, they’ll have a bit of fluff, but they’re more about the iron-rich oomph than the airiness.
Do these blood pancakes taste like I’m at a vampire’s brunch or what?
Oh, the taste? Imagine a pancake that went to culinary school — sophisticated, yet humble. The blood is like that secret ingredient that chefs wink about but never spill; it’s there, but it’s a silent partner in crime, adding richness without any of the ick-factor. You’re in for a treat that’s as tasty as it is mysterious, with zero traces of a crime scene flavor. It’s all the yum without the “um, is that blood?”
Will these pancakes turn me into a vampire?
No, but they might give you the power to face the day with unbridled enthusiasm and a slightly more gothic culinary reputation.
What’s the best way to explain these pancakes to my squeamish friends?
Just tell them it’s a rustic, protein-packed delicacy that’s been enjoyed for centuries. Or, you know, casually drop that you’re exploring Viking cuisine. Ah, we Finns were the toughest Vikings — we have a history so fierce that the Swedes have been stealing it and sweeping it under the rug like last winter’s snowflakes!
How do I prevent my kitchen from looking like a crime scene?
Apron up, my friend! And maybe keep wet kitchen towels handy. Cooking with blood can be a bit of a splatter fest, but it’s all part of the charm.
Can I make these pancakes ahead of time, or will they summon something from the other side?
You’re safe to prep them in advance; no supernatural occurrences guaranteed. Just store them in the fridge and reheat when you’re ready to indulge.
What if I accidentally make too much and end up with a blood pancake mountain?
Invite your friends over for a “Game of Thrones” marathon and feast like the Starks. Or freeze them for a rainy day when you need a boost of easy hemoglobin-powered energy. And if all else fails, you can always donate them to the local vampire bat sanctuary. (Just kidding, please don’t do that.)
Is there a way to make these pancakes look less…vampiric?
Garnish is key. A sprig of parsley or some berries can add a pop of color and distract from the fact that you’re eating something that could double as a prop in a horror film. We Finns eat our blood pancakes with lingonberries, usually mashed lingonberries that are sweetened.
When and how do we indulge in the glory of blood pancakes?
In the land of a thousand lakes and more than a million saunas, we Finns savor our blood pancakes not at the break of dawn, but as a hearty lunch or a robust dinner — fork in one hand, a sense of adventure in the other, and perhaps a side of lingonberry jam to sweeten the deal! (You certainly want to keep it low in sugars, so skip the tooth-tickling sweet jam and grab a handful of real berries instead.)
Remember, folks, cooking is an adventure, and these Carnivore Blood Pancakes are your ticket to the culinary wild side. Bon bloody appétit, you fearless foodies!
Step-by-Step Instructions on How to Make These Savory and Criminally Nutritious Pancakes
Alright, my daring diners, now that you’re all hyped up on the lore of the legendary blood pancakes and positively itching to whip up a batch, let’s dive fork-first into the nitty-gritty of crafting these iron-rich beauties:
First up, rustle up 3 eggs that have had more freedom than a bald eagle on the Fourth of July (that’s organic and free-range, for the uninitiated).
Give them a whirl with your electric mixer until they’re fluffier than a poodle at a dog show.
Now, for the pièce de résistance: add a cup (240 ml) of the finest bovine life juice (aka beef blood). Hey, it looks exactly like juice from red berries!
Sprinkle in a pinch (or a whole teaspoon, if you’re feeling salty like me) of the good old unrefined sea salt.
Give it a whisk like you’re conducting an orchestra until it’s more mixed than a playlist on shuffle.
Heat up your pancake pan, skillet, or griddle — or, if you’re a real maverick, an iron shield over an open flame. Slather that surface with a generous helping of butter or tallow until it’s slipperier than an eel in an oil spill.
Give that batter another quick whisk because, like an unsupervised toddler, the foamy eggs will have floated to the top.
Pour your sanguineous mixture onto the pan, creating little pancake patties that Dracula would envy.
When the underside is as dark as a moonless night, flip those flapjacks.
Let them cook until they’re as done as a vampire at sunrise.
Keep the process rolling with the rest of your batter, making sure to butter up your pan like you’re trying to bribe it.
Whisk, pour, cook, and flip until you’ve got a stack high enough to impress a werewolf.
Serve these carnivorous concoctions straight up, or if you’re one of those “I can handle a berry or two” types, toss a few cranberries on the side for a pop of color (that is if you cannot get real lingonberries, which are an essential Nordic element in savoring blood pancakes).
And voilà! I guarantee these blood pancakes will have you saying “Yum!” with more enthusiasm than a ghoul in a graveyard.
How I Came up with This Dreadfully Easy Carnivore Recipe
Once upon a time, in a kitchen not so far away, I found myself in a culinary conundrum that would lead to the creation of the now-infamous Carnivore Blood Pancake recipe. It all started with a message from one of my Finnish followers, who, with a twinkle in her eye and a rumble in her tummy, asked if I could conjure up a keto-friendly version of beloved blood pancakes, a traditional Finnish recipe.
Armed with nothing but my wits and a bag of very fine potato fiber (yes, potato fiber, not starch or flour), I set out to recreate the magic of my previously perfected keto blood pancakes. But alas, the recipe was lost, likely in the same place where single socks go to die. So, with the determination of a squirrel in the fall, I started from scratch, pondering the perfect combination of ingredients and measurements.
Then, like a bolt of lightning from the blue, inspiration struck! I recalled a podcast where a woman mentioned that in some far-off land, indigenous folks crafted pancakes using merely blood and eggs. Given that Finnish blood pancakes have graced our tables for centuries, the idea wasn’t just clever — it was practically heritage calling!
As a devout follower of the carnivore diet for nearly a year, the concept of blood and egg pancakes seduced my culinary soul. I was ready to embark on a gastronomic adventure.
But how many eggs? How much blood? The proportions were a mystery as deep as the Finnish forests. I took a leap of faith, trusting my instincts to guide the ratio like a Viking navigating by the stars. The goal? Tasty pancakes that could make Dracula jealous.
To my utter astonishment, these pancakes were as sturdy as a lumberjack’s handshake. They clung together with the tenacity of a Finnish sauna enthusiast in mid-winter, even as I crafted them large enough to blanket my entire skillet.
And the taste? Oh, the taste! It was as if the eggs and blood had danced a Finnish tango and seasoned their performance with nothing but a sprinkle of salt. I was gobsmacked by the deliciousness that had unfolded from such simplicity.
For my Finnish kin, I crafted a special blend: beef blood for the robust, eggs for the structure, potato fiber to retain the fluff, unrefined sea salt for the twang, onion powder for the zing, and white pepper for a subtle kick. The result? A culinary symphony worthy of a standing ovation.
In a cheeky twist, I sauntered to the local grocery store and snapped a photo of the commercial blood pancake package, an abomination filled with pig blood, rye and wheat flour, and a whole host of unpronounceables like margarine with its canola oil and emulsifiers, not to mention the dreaded dextrose. I chuckled to myself, knowing that my creation was far superior to these mass-produced, flour-laden frisbees.
With a smirk, I thought of those poor pancakes, laden with everything but the kitchen sink, and I felt a twinge of pride for my minimalist masterpiece. You could bet your last sauna session that my pancakes were the real deal, a testament to the carnivore creed, and a slap in the face to the processed pancake purveyors of lesser fare.
So there I stood, in my kitchen-turned-laboratory, armed with my blood, eggs, and a dash of salt for seasoning, having birthed a recipe that was not only delicious but true to my carnivorous calling. The Carnivore Blood Pancake was no longer just a recipe; it was a revolution on a plate, a symbol of dietary defiance, and a delicious declaration that, sometimes, the simplest things in life are the most satisfying.
And to all those who doubted the power of blood and eggs alone, I raised a pancake in triumph and declared, “Behold the power of protein!” And it was not just yum; it was a victory.
Here’s the recipe for you to enjoy:
- 3 organic free-range eggs
- 1 cup = 240 ml beef blood
- unrefined sea salt to taste
- With an electric mixer, beat the eggs until pale and fluffy.
- Add the blood and salt. Whisk until well combined.
- Fry large or small pancakes in ample butter or tallow. Remember to whisk the batter before frying a new batch of pancakes, as the beaten eggs might rise on the top.
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|Per pancake (makes 24 small pancakes)
Tips for Variations
If you’re ready to jazz up your Carnivore Blood Pancake recipe and take a walk on the wild side of flavor town, here are some tips for variations that’ll make your taste buds do the tango:
- Herb It Up: Infuse your batter with fresh herbs like thyme, rosemary, or oregano for an aromatic twist. Finely chop your chosen greens and whisk them into the mix for a garden-fresh flavor.
- Cheese, Please: Grate some sharp cheddar or sprinkle in some crumbled feta for a tangy kick. The cheese will melt into the pancake, creating little pockets of joy with every bite.
- Spice is Nice: Add a pinch of smoked paprika, cayenne pepper, or chipotle powder to give your pancakes a smoky depth and a heat that’ll warm you from the inside out.
- Garlic Gets In: A little garlic powder goes a long way. It will make your pancakes a garlic lover’s dream (and keep the vampires at bay!).
- Bacon Bonanza: Cook up some bacon until it’s crispy, crumble it, and fold it into the batter. Bacon bits in your blood pancakes will make them a double meaty marvel.
- Mushroom Magic: Finely chop some mushrooms and sauté them before adding to the batter. They’ll add an earthy flavor that complements the rich taste of the blood.
- Onion Oomph: A little bit of finely minced onion or shallots can add a sweet and savory note that elevates the whole experience.
- Zesty Lemon: A bit of freshly grated organic lemon zest can brighten up the pancakes and add a refreshing twist to the savory flavor.
Remember, the key to a great variation is to start with small amounts and adjust to your taste. The beauty of this recipe is its simplicity, so you don’t want to overwhelm the fundamental flavors that make it special. Experiment with these variations and find your new favorite way to enjoy Carnivore Blood Pancakes!
My Finnish Keto Blood Pancake Recipe
To quench the insatiable thirst of your curiosity, behold the full recipe straight from my Finnish blog — now in glorious English, since over 90% of my beloved readers can’t tell “moi” from “kiitos” in Finnish!
1.05668821 US cups (2 1/2 dl) beef blood
0.422675284 US cups (1 dl) Elli’s Premium potato fiber
1 teaspoon (or to taste) unrefined sea salt
1 teaspoon Elli’s organic onion powder
pinch of white pepper
3 organic free-range eggs
Pour the beef blood into a bowl. Toss in the potato fiber, sea salt, onion powder, and white pepper, and whip it well to avoid the dreaded lump invasion. Set it aside for a little timeout.
- In another bowl, give the eggs a good ol’ electric whisking until they’re fluffed up into a pale, cloud-like froth.
- Now for the magic moment: fold the egg fluff into the blood mixture. Stir with your trusty whisk until it’s as smooth as a jazz saxophonist’s serenade.
- Time to fry up those pancakes — go big or go bite-sized, your call — in a generous dollop of butter. Give that batter a brisk whisk before pouring each new batch; the egg fluff likes to rise to the top like it’s reaching for the stars.
- Serve up your blood pancakes with a side of unsweetened lingonberry smash or whole berries, and watch them vanish quicker than a plate of cookies at a preschool party.
Another week has zoomed by, not so silently for me, given it’s been a flurry of activity — quite literally. The skies decided to unload a heap of snow, and since our property manager seems to think he’s in hibernation, I, the ever-diligent chairwoman of our housing company, took to shoveling like a Finnish Santa minus the reindeer. With each scoop, I showed that slothful soul just how a Nordic woman gets down to business, leaving sluggish men in my powdery wake.
In the midst of this winter wonderland workout, my online store kept me on my toes, packing orders with the precision of a Christmas elf in crunch time. And oh, let’s not forget the pièce de résistance: the creation of my upcoming carnivore product’s latest and greatest iteration — so good it’s got me doing the happy dance on ice!
Amidst all this, my fingers have been skating across the keyboard, conjuring up a new ebook for an upcoming keto bundle that’s sure to knock your woolen socks off. Keep your eyes peeled — exciting times are on the horizon!